Lilia’s Blog

In this life, there are no Fairy Godmothers or other people or sources outside of ourselves that we can rely on to make our dreams come true. Whether you are happy or unhappy with your current status or circumstances in life, there is only one person who can and must take full responsibility for it, and that person is you. 

Only you have the power to decide what you want. Only you know the right thing to do. Only you can decide where to focus your attention, and thus, only you can take action to make your life what you want it to be. Although you may not have control over the actions of others or other outside forces or events, you do have control over your reactions to those people or events.

With time, we gain experience. With experience comes wisdom. If you think about where you are now and think back to thoughts you had, decisions you made and actions you took in the past, you can be sure that those thoughts, decisions and actions got you where you are today.  In planning for success, it is important to consider your past experience and use it as a guide in directing the path that will lead to success. Use both your experiences and the wisdom gained from those experiences to help you achieve the success that you seek.

Success means different things to different people. However you define it, one thing is certain: you are the only person responsible for achieving your own success. Get what you want. Start Here. Start Now. 

Lilia Fallgatter is a motivational speaker and author of “Get What You Want! Start Here, Start Now.” Join Lilia for her next tele-seminar workshop in which she shares the “5 Essential Truths for achieving success.” Register at http://www.lovingletter.com/getit.htm or visit her website at http://www.lovingletter.com
©2009 Lilia L. Fallgatter

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Are you unhappy, unmotivated and uninspired with life? Then it’s time to reevaluate, rediscover and re-ignite your passion for life and living it the way you want to live it. How? The answer is simple: Do what you love and the rest will fall into place. Below are the two simple steps to follow -

1. Find out what you love to do

What do you love to do? You may know the answer to this question already. What you love to do may not be limited to one thing. Therefore, a better question may be - What do you love doing most? If you don’t know the answer, here are a few ways in which to discover (or rediscover) it: The first way in which to discover what you love, is to revisit your childhood dreams. When you were a child, what did you dream of growing up to do? Did you have an interest in something specific? Interests developed at a young age can clue you into long lost passions you can explore anew. The second way is to examine your talents. Is there something you are inherently good at and also enjoy doing? Perhaps you have developed special talents over time through eduction or training. A third way in which uncover your passion is to think about  things you may enjoy doing so much, that you lose track of time while doing it. Lastly, consider things you do which draw an emotional positive response from you each time you do it.

2. Do what you love on a regular basis 

Once you know what it is you love to do, you should try to find ways in which to do those things for a living, or try to find ways to incorporate those things into your life regularly. Working at doing something you love to do does not feel like work. Thus, being able to do what you love to support yourself would be ideal. If that is not feasible, then making time in your schedule to do what you love is the next best thing. 

 Doing what you love is one of the fastest and easiest ways in which to recharge your enthusiasm and re-ignite your passion for life. Why wait? Do it now.  

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Lilia L. Fallgatter is an author and motivational speaker. Register for her next appearance “Get What You Want! Start Here, Start Now” on May 23rd in Chandler, AZ or order her book and audio CD - http://www.lovingletter.com/getit.htm

2009 Lilia L. Fallgatter

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Workshops and seminars can be an ideal way in which to market your business and attract more clients or customers to your product or service. These events are relatively simple to create and deliver, and can be extremely cost effective. Really good workshops can create a word of mouth buzz in the community and garner attention you may not otherwise attract. Below are 6 factors  to consider:

Are workshops right for your business?

One of the ways in which to determine the answer to this question is to ask “Is there something of value related to my business, product or service that I can teach and which will benefit prospective clients or customers?”  If the answer is yes, then workshops are something you should consider. Many types of products and services lend themselves this method of marketing. Authors and publishers, for example may develop workshops around the subject of their books (writing, cooking, etc.) Businesses such as salons may teach clients how to conduct personal make-overs using products they wish to sell. The same is true of professional legal, accounting and insurance firms, who can develop workshops around the services they provide.

Why offering a workshop is important?

Workshops provide prospective clients with valuable and beneficial information about your field of expertise. The fact that you are delivering the information contributes to the trust factor. You have provided information they need at little or no cost. As previously noted, workshops which are particularly well developed and delivered can create excitement about the topic and lead to word of mouth recommendations of the workshop and business offering the workshop. 

What does it take to create a workshop?

In order to create a workshop you will, first and foremost, require a subject matter expert. That person may be you or someone within your company who knows the most about the topic. That person will help to develop the content and may, depending on their skills, deliver the information. In addition to interesting and informative content, you should incorporate appealing audio/visual components to the presentation, and distribute useful handouts for participants to take with them. 

Delivery Methods -

The workshop or seminar may delivered in the traditional face-to-face format the venue or setting should be appropriate and comfortable for participants. Other delivery methods include tele-seminar and webinar workshops. Workshops may also be recorded and distributed via e-mail as audio or video downloads or on CD.

How to market your workshop -

Once the workshop has been developed, you will need to get the word out. Distributing workshop dates and registration information can be accomplished in much the same way in which you market your business in general. E-mail notification to your existing client base, posting it on your website, announcing it via social networking cites, making fliers available at various locations and including it in the events sections of craigslist.com or community newspapers are only a few ways by which to spread the word.

Join Lilia Fallgatter for her “Best-Selling Workshops” tele-seminar. Register at http://www.lovingletter.com/workshop

©2009 Lilia L. Fallgatter

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As Twitter continues to morph into the biggest social networking media on the planet, new twerminology continues to spring up amid the billions of live streaming tweets that occur daily. If you are new to Twitter, it may behoove you to familiarize yourself with some of the twerms, so that you don’t come across as a twerd (or twerp) to be avoided by would be followers. Below is just a small twampling of some of the twerms you may encounter:

Twitterer - One who twitters/tweets on Twitter

Tweet - Your posts/entries on Twitter

Tweeple - Twitter people

Tweeps - A shortened version of twitter people

Twontent - The substance of your tweets

Twontest - A contest between Twitterers vying for the highest number of followers on Twitter. @Aplusk (Ashton Kutcher) was the first to reach one million followers.

Twaddicts - Tweeple who become so highly addicted to Twitter, it impacts every other area of their lives.

Twerapy - Tweatment for twaddicts.

Armed with these twerms, you should enter the Twitterverse with confidence that you now, (to a certain extent) speak the language.  Happy tweeting.

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With Mother’s Day right around the corner, many will be wondering what to give the woman who has given so much of herself.

Being a mother is a huge responsibility which requires the giving of unconditional love and much self-sacrifice. So what gift can you give Mom that will clearly express your love, gratitude and appreciation for all she has done? The answer is simple. A heartfelt thank you letter expressing just that. Here’s what you need: a pen, a piece of paper, your memories, your feelings, and the time set aside to put them all together.

Why not  just say ”thanks” in person, by e-mail or text you ask? Well, it’s just not the same. Taking the time to think about and write a personal, heartfelt handwritten letter telling Mom how much she means to you and explaining why she means so much, will mean more to her than you’ll ever know. Without even realizing it, you may be crafting a precious gift that will become a treasured keepsake Mom can revisit in the years ahead.

If your having trouble getting started, read ”The Most Important Letter You Will Ever Write, How To Tell Loved Ones How You Feel ~ Before It’s Too Late.,” which offers tips on how to capture your feelings on paper. Once completed, the letter can be rolled (like a scroll), tied with a ribbon and placed in a gift box, or it can be paired with another gift, such as a frame or stationery. Better yet, gather old family photos and place them together with the letter in a scrapbook.  It may be ”the best Mother’s Day gift ever.”     

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Lilia L. Fallgatter, JD is a writer, publisher, speaker, online education administrator and author of “The Most Important Letter You Will Ever Write, How To Tell Loved Ones How You Feel ~ Before It’s Too Late.” She has written articles and e-books on self-improvement and personal growth topics and considers it her mission to help others improve their lives. Visit her blog at http://www.lovingletter.com/wordpress or “tweet” her http://twitter.com/HowToSayIt

©2009 Lilia L. Fallgatter

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The state of the American economy has many feeling down. As the bad news is disseminated daily, it is easy to see how and why people - even the most optimistic of whom -  may be having trouble shaking the blues. Below is a list of things you can try  to help you snap out of it. They won’t resolve you problems, but can help take your mind off of things momentarily.

1. Reconnect with old friends - Talking to old friends will take you back to times enjoyed together in the past. It is also interesting to learn about what they’ve been up to and how their lives are going.
2. Take a brisk walk/run outdoors - If the weather permits, exercising in the outdoors let us connect with and appreciate nature.
3. Call/see your favorite person - Your  favorite person is just that because you feel good when you are around them.
4. Watch your favorite movie - Like your favorite person, your favorite movie is likely your favorite because watching it makes you feel good. 
5. Eat your favorite food - This is usually comfort food which remind us of good times. As long as you don’t over indulge, you need not feel guilty.
6. Write in a journal - Keeping a journal detailing your thoughts and feelings helps to unburden yourself of those feelings and move on to more positive things.
7. Write a letter, poem or song - Writing can have therapeutic effects, and the same is true of engaging in creative endeavors.
8. Meditate - Quieting your mind and focusing within are said to have beneficial effects. 
9. Organize a soiree - Surround yourself with friends and loved ones in a social setting and see if that doesn’t lift your spirits.  
10. Go fishing - Ever seen a stressed out fisherman? Being around water can be very soothing.
11. Go swimming - Submerging yourself in water and getting exercise can be soothing and stimulating at the same time.
12. Listen to upbeat music - Ever wonder why people exercise, clean or work to upbeat music? Perhaps it makes you feel more energetic. Whatever the reason, it works.
13. Volunteer your time - Giving of your time for a good cause or purpose is sure to make you feel good.
14. Take a bubble bath - Submerging yourself in warm water can be incredibly relaxing.
15. Get a massage - Any massage, whether from your spa or your spouse, eases tension and feels good.
16. Take a long drive - Your one hour commute does not count. Taking a drive out in a scenic rural area will not only lull you into calmness, but will make you appreciate nature. 
17. Sit under a tree and read - Lose yourself in a good book and connect with nature at the same time.
18. Dance - Good dancer or not, moving your body to the rhythm of the music can be fun and energizing.
19. Enroll in a workshop - Learn to do something you’ve always wanted to do.
20. Help an elderly person - Run an errand or fix something around the house. Whatever you do to help, they will appreciate it.
21. Watch your old home videos - Laugh at the antics of the children or your 80’s hairstyle. Laughter truly is the best medicine.
22. Take a long nap - If you are like most people, you are sleep deprived. Pamper yourself with a nice long nap to feel rejuvenated.
23. Play with a child - Just hearing the laughter of a child can make you smile. 

 Lilia L. Fallgatter, JD is a writer, publisher, speaker, online education administrator and author of “The Most Important Letter You Will Ever Write, How To Tell Loved Ones How You Feel ~ Before It’s Too Late.” She has written articles and e-books on self-improvement and personal growth topics and considers it her mission to help others improve their lives. Visit her blog at http://www.lovingletter.com/wordpress or “tweet” her http://twitter.com/HowToSayIt

©2009 Lilia L. Fallgatter

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I started using Twitter a short time ago. Twitter is a microblog which allows users to post updates (tweets) which are no more than 140 characters in length. Although I enjoyed using Twitter, after a while I began to tire of tweeting about how I felt, what I’d had for lunch, what events I’d attended or what my plans were for the week. As an author, I am always in search of new ways in which to get the word out about my work. It struck me that I could utilize Twitter to feature excerpts from my book, “The Most Important Letter You Will Ever Write” (Inspirit Books). I decided to research the concept. Afterall, this idea must certainly have occurred to someone other than just me. Sure enough, I found two other twerials (Twitter Serials.) These, however, were works of fiction being written on Twitter, and were not previously copyrighted. Since most Twitterers are likely to have short attention spans (note the 140 character limit), I wonder if the twerial is a harebrained idea distined to fail. I’ll keep you posted on my results. Be sure to follow me on Twitter , join me on Linkedin  or “friend” me on Facebook.

Below is my twerial as posted on Twitter. To read it, begin with the first tweet at the very bottom and work your way up:

The excerpted Chapter was printed with permission of the author (namely, me) Copyright 2009 Lilia Fallgatter

The preceding was my #twerial (twitter serial) featuring an excerpted chapter from my book. You can buy the book@ www.lovingletter.com

…offer good words, honor those we love and touch the lives of those around us - before it’s too late.

…cared. As previously noted, focusing on death forces us to look at life from a completely different perspective. Let us go forth, …

…is not about death and dying, it’s about life and living it without regrets that someone we cared about never really knew how much we …

…when you have touched the lives of others in a positive way, the effects of your efforts comes back to you many times over. This book…

… As you know by now, you need not imagine it. It is possible. As George Bailey found out on that cold winter night in

…and sent the letter. Imagine never having to worry about the possibility that those you loved never knew how you felt about them.

…year later, her uncle passed away - not knowing what he had meant to her. Needless to say, Marisa fervently wished she had finished …

…fact that she had written the first draft of the letter, Marisa never quite got around to finishing or mailing the letter. Less than a…

…assignment, Marisa wrote a letter to an uncle who had had a significant positive impact on her when she was a young girl. Despite the …

…those things. This was experienced first hand by my sister, Marisa, who participated in one of my workshops. As part of the workshop …

… in light of those statistics, some things are far too important to put off. Letting loved ones know how you feel about them is one of…

That information was included not to instill fear or panic, but to acknowledge that our time here is limited and also to recognize that …

…form of human kindness and compassion. Chapter 2 included death statistics for 2002. Over 2.4 million people died in the U.S. that year.

…experiencing or observing tragedy seems to bring out the best in human nature and creates a ray of hope. Hope, which emerges in the …

…is exposed in this way, we can somehow find the strength to reach out to those around us, whether loved ones or strangers. Amazingly, …

…as those noted above, have the effect of forcing us to reflect on our own lives. Interestingly, it seems that when human vulnerability…

…occurrence of such events, whether a deliberate act of terror, a destructive force of nature, or military action. Tragic events, such …

…families whose loved ones have been lost or injured. The fragility and preciousness of life is brought to the forefront with the …

…displacing several hundreds of thousands more. In addition, U.S. military action in Iraq has caused loss of life and affected many …

…followed in quick succession by hurricanes Rita and Wilma, wreaked havoc on the U.S. Gulf Coast, killing hundreds of people and …

… 2004, killed over 250 thousand people and left utter devastation in its wake. Similarly, on August 29, 2005, Hurricane Katrina, …

…a Loving Letter can be invaluable; not just to your loved ones, but to you as well. The tsunami that occurred in Asia on December 26,…

…will know for certain that they were aware they had an impact on you and how much they mattered to you. For those reasons alone, …

…that if, and when, you lose the people you love, you can be certain that they knew exactly how much you cared about them and why. You…

…we covered the benefits of putting our thoughts and feelings in writing. One of the greatest benefits of writing a Loving Letter, is…

…becomes a shared experience, which may enhance (in even the smallest way) our own life and the lives of those we love. In Chapter 4, …

… a Living Letter. Because it is given to the intended recipient while the author is still living, the Loving Letter communication …

…we love, know how we feel about them now- while we and they are still alive. Thus, the Loving Letter might more effectively be called…

…difference, of course, is that a Loving Letter is delivered while the person who wrote it is still living. The purpose is to let those…

… immeasureable and their impact immense. The concept of the Loving Letter is much the same as that of death letters. The biggest …

… reaction, however, that his words to to them were meaningful beyond expression. The value of the letters to those left behind was …

… his death. As a viewer, it was heartwarming, yet heart-wrenching to hear the words he had written to them. It was clear from their . . .

…where the father and wife of a firefighter, who lost his life on 9/11, were reading portions of the letters they were given following…

…death in the line of duty. A few weeks following the attacks, I was changing the channel on my television, when I came upon a program …

…are written to loved ones, such as parents, spouses and children, and are to be delivered to them in the event of the individual’s …

… losing their lives. Examples of such professions include firefighters, law enforcement officers and military personnel. The letters …

… to here as “death letters.” Death letters are letters written by persons in professions whose duties may place them in danger of …

Chapter 13 - Before It’s Too Late - The horrendous attacks that occurred on September 11, 2001, made me aware of something I’ll refer . . .

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Unless you have spent the last year in a cave somewhere, you have likely heard of Twitter. You may, in fact, be tweeting as I write this. Just in case you did spend the last year in a cave, however, I will explain. Twitter is a free social networking and micro-blogging site that enables users to stay connected in real-time.

A late bloomer to social media, I first learned of Twitter while attending a conference on emerging technologies in online education. As an Administrator of online college programs, I was curious to learn how social media might serve a beneficial purpose in distance education. I also wondered how these technologies might effectively assist me as a speaker, author and publisher of self-help books.
 
Described as a service “for staying in touch and keeping up with friends no matter where you are or what you’re doing,” (from Twitter.com) Twitter users follow one another and post updates (a.k.a. tweets) which may not exceed 140 characters. The first time I logged in, I was not impressed. I didn’t know any other twitterers and most tweets I read were about what the person was having for lunch.
 
I began actually using Twitter, more than a year after logging in for the first time, at the urging of Social Media Guru, Peter Shankman. As a subscriber to his free Help A Reporter Out service, I follow and frequently check @skydiver Twitter updates for urgent queries.
 
What I love most about Twitter is its’ simplicity and informal tone. What I like least, is how additive it can become. Still new to Twitter, I continue to learn the ropes. To date, I am following 17 people and there are 35 people following me. This is small potatoes compared to the thousands of followers others have attracted, but I look forward to attracting a much larger following. The folks I follow are scattered across the nation and some are in other countries. Some I know personally, such as @PatriciaBrooks, some are celebrities, such as @The_Real_Nash, whom I follow because we are huge Phoenix Suns and Steve Nash fans in our household. Some I have not personally met, but I find their tweets informative and/or interesting.
 
Twitter is being heralded by many as a powerful marketing tool with an estimated six million users. This has not gone unnoticed by major companies, who can now be found on Twitter. Even President Barack Obama has fallen in line. You can follow him @BarackObama.
 
If you are not yet a user and decide to check it out, be sure to tweet me @HowToSayIt http://twitter.com/HowToSayIt

©2009 Lilia L. Fallgatter

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If you’re like most people around the country, you have been directly affected in one way or another by the current economic crisis.

As frightening as an economic crisis can be, there may actually be an upside to it all. Like other difficult situations we may experience in life, the bad economy may force us to reflect upon and re-evaluate the way we live and the choices we make, financially speaking. Any situation that causes us to more closely examine our lives is wake-up call we should take seriously.

As humans, we tend to fall into ruts and routines and may fail to focus on the really important things. In this case, it’s planning and preparing for surviving in a tough economy. Thus, many of us are left to scramble to make changes when faced with a job loss or potential job loss.

One thing we can do immediately is to find ways in which to cut costs. In evaluating expenses, you may discover that there are several things you pay for that may suddenly not be necessities you can’t live without. A prime example, are things we pay other people to do that we can do ourselves. Do you pay someone to: maintain your yard and landscaping, maintain your pool, clean your home, walk your dog, or wash your car? These are all things we can do for ourselves and you would be amazed at how quickly the savings add up. Do you pay for dry cleaning or salon services? If so, cutting these extra services or reducing their frequency can immediately reduce your expenses.

Another way in which to help yourself, is to identify ways in which to make extra money without having to take on a second or part-time job. Many are clearing their homes of clutter and selling unneeded items or collectibles in yard or garage sales or on internet sites such as Ebay or Craigslist.

Situations like the current economic issues we face help us to hone not just our survival instincts, but our creativity as well. Thus, if you have not already done so, it’s time to get your creative groove on and focus on the good things that can come out of this: Less wasteful spending and more resourcefulness on our part.

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